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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Sarcastic Things People Say - 196
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P. G. Wodehouse, The Man Upstairs (1914)
It is a good rule in life never to apologize. The right sort of people do not want apologies, and the wrong sort take a mean advantage of them.
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David P Gardner
We learn simply by the exposure of living, and what we learn most natively is the tradition in which we live.
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Mark Twain
Pessimism is only the name that men of weak nerve give to wisdom.
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Fredirect Toyou
Bibo, ergo sum. - I drink, therefore I am
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Dodie Smith
I don't like the sound of all those lists he's making - it's like taking too many notes at school you feel you've achieved something when you haven't.
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Thomas Fuller
Two things a man should never be angry at what he can help, and what he cannot help.
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John Stuart Mill
All good things which exist are the fruits of originality.
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Alvin Dark, former baseball coach
Any pitcher who throws at a batter and deliberately tries to hit him is a communist.
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Joel S. Goldsmith
God must become an activity in our consciousness.
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The Clown Prince of Darkness, corresponsdence
Blessed be the meek, for they shall inherit six feet of the earth.
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Henry David Thoreau
What people say you cannot do, you try and find that you can.
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John Stuart Mill
Indeed the dictum that truth always triumphs over persecution, is one of those pleasant falsehoods which men repeat after one another till they pass into common places, but which all experience refutes.
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