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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Amusing Things People Say - 187
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John Stuart Mill
Everyone who receives the protection of society owes a return for the benefit.
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Dr. Frank Crane
You may be deceived if you trust too much, but you will live in torment if you do not trust enough.
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Tao Le Ching
It is only by not trusting that you turn someone into a liar.
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Oprah Winfrey
Every time you state what you want or believe, you're the first to hear it. It's a message to both you and others about what you think is possible. Don't put a ceiling on yourself.
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Brian Aldiss
When childhood dies, its corpses are called adults and they enter society, one of the politer names of hell. That is why we dread children, even if we love them, they show us the state of our decay.
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Georges Clemenceau
War is much too serious a matter to be entrusted to the military.
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Oscar Wilde, The Critic as Artist, part 2, 1891
A little sincerity is a dangerous thing, and a great deal of it is absolutely fatal.
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Aristotle
It is not always the same thing to be a good man and a good citizen.
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Darius Ogden Mills
I was taught very early that I would have to depend entirely upon myself that my future lay in my own hands.
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John Brown
Be mild with the mild, shrewd with the crafty, confiding to the honest, rough to the ruffian, and a thunderbolt to the liar. But in all this, never be unmindful of your own dignity.
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Douglas Pagels, A Wonderful Resolution For The New Year!
Each new day is a blank page in the diary of your life. The secret of success is in turning that diary into the best story you possibly can.
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Selma Lagerloef
He who is sorrowful can force himself to smile, but he who is glad cannot weep.
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