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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Humour Famous People Sayings - 134
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Jean Ingelow
I have lived to thank God that all my prayers have not been answered.
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Vernon Howard
Every day that you attempt to see things as they are in truth Is a supremely successful day.
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Frank Luntz
Quite frankly Ted, the very mention of the word 'Republican' seems to have negative connotations for the Americans in our studio.
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Pierre Trudeau, CBC Archives
The state has no business in the bedrooms of the nation.
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George Santayana
Fanaticism consists in redoubling your effort when you have forgotten your aim.
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Blessing Irish
May the sun always shine on your windowpane May a rainbow be certain to follow each rain May the hand of a friend always be near you May God fill your heart with gladness to cheer you.
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Damon Runyon
One of these days in your travels, a guy is going to come up to you and show you a nice brand-new deck of cards on which the seal is not yet broken, and this guy is going to offer to bet you that he can make the Jack of Spades jump out of the deck and squirt cider in your ear. But, son, do not bet this man, for as sure as you are standing there, you are going to end up with an earful of cider.
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Stanislaw Lec
You must first have a lot of patience to learn to have patience.
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Theocritus of Chios
Now begins a torrent of words and a trickling of sense.
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Sir Winston Leonard Spenser Churchill
An appeaser is one who feeds a crocodile, hoping it will eat him last.
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Japanese Proverb
Beginning is easy - Continuing is hard.
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Dietrich Bonhoeffer
To endure the cross is not tragedy it is the suffering which is the fruit of an exclusive allegiance to Jesus Christ.
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