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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Funniest Proverbs and Quotations - 139
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Jeffrey Klein
Because I'm technologically able to find a like-minded person on the other side of the globe, I'm also more interested in making friends with my next-door neighbor.
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Steven Wright, Standup Comedy Routine
I went to a restaurant that serves breakfast at any time. So I ordered French Toast during the Renaissance.
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Oscar Wilde
Morality, like art, means a drawing a line someplace.
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Kayvan Sylvan
Dubito ergo sum - I doubt therefore I am
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Cicero
The absolute good is not a matter of opinion but of nature.
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Edward Bulwer-Lytton
A life of pleasure makes even the strongest mind frivolous at last.
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Gilbert Keith Chesterton
The only words that ever satisfied me as describing Nature are the terms used in fairy books, charm, spell, enchantment. They express the arbitrariness of the fact and its mystery.
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Paul Valery
La politique est l'art d'empcher les gens de se mler de ce qui les regarde. (Politics is the art of preventing people from sticking their noses in things that are properly their business.
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Reverend Sean Parker Dennison, Ministrare, 2-10-05
The ability to see beauty is the beginning of our moral sensibility. What we believe is beautiful we will not wantonly destroy.
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Cicero
Art is born of the observation and investigation of nature.
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Groucho Marx
Military intelligence is a contradiction in terms.
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Peter Ustinov
Children are the only form of immortality that we can be sure of.
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