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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Very Funny Things People Say - 130
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Benjamin Franklin
Drive thy business or it will drive thee.
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Edmund Burke
Better be despised for too anxious apprehensions, than ruined by too confident security.
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Andrew Schneider
By mid-November I always like to have an extra 15 pounds on me.
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Ralph J. Smith
Engineering is the professional art of applying science to the optimum conversion of natural resources to the benefit of man.
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Christine Todd
'These are days you'll remember.' If you recall nothing else from your graduation ceremony, remember you heard the New Jersey Governor quote from '10
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L. Neil Smith
And yet, what is bravery but the capacity to reject our fears, ignore and supress them, then go on to do whatever it is we are afraid to do.
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Thomas Jefferson
Say nothing of my religion. It is known to God and myself alone. Its evidence before the world is to be sought in my life if it has been honest and dutiful to society the religion which has regulated it cannot be a bad one.
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Euripides
Human excellence means nothing unless it works with the consent of God.
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Charles Buxton
Experience shows that success is due less to ability that to zeal. The winner is he who gives himself to his work, body and soul.
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Woody Allen
Interestingly, according to modern astronomers, space is finite. This is a very comforting thought-- particularly for people who can never remember where they have left things.
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Pliny The Elder
True glory consists in doing what deserves to be written; in writing what deserves to be read; and in so living as to make the world happier for our living in it.
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Norman Mailer
Every moment of one's existence one is growing into more or retreating into less.
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