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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Crazy Proverbs and Quotations - 103
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Samuel Richardson
Good men must be affectionate men.
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Unknown
Cats are intended to teach us that not everything in nature has a function.
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Marcus Aelius Aurelius
Think on this doctrine,--that reasoning beings were created for one another's sake that to be patient is a branch of justice, and that men sin without intending it.
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Jack Handey Deep Thoughts
How come, just as the rocket is launching, the astronauts don't also shoot some fireworks out the window It would make the whole takeoff look more impressive.
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Dr. Jeffrey Borenstein
Just when you think that a person is just a backdrop for the rest of the universe, watch them and see that they laugh, they cry, they tell jokes ... they're just friends waiting to be made.
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Joseph Stalin, Brainy Quote
The writer is the engineer of the human soul.
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Sir Ronald A. Fisher
Our view. . . is that it is an essential characteristic of experimentation that it is carried out with limited resources, and an essential part of the subject of experimental design to ascertain how these should be best applied; or, in particular, to which causes of disturbance care should be given, and which ought to be deliberately ignored.
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Belva Plain
How helpless we are, like netted birds, when we are caught by desire
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Oscar Fingall O\'Flahertie Wills Wilde
Young people, nowadays, imagine that money is everything and when they grow older, they know it.
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La Rochefoucauld
Everyone complains of his memory, none of his judgment.
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Dietrich Bonhoffer
Action springs not from thought, but from a readiness for responsibility.
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Barbara Hall
One of the things that keeps you from dropping them in the nearest volcano is that you had to work too hard to get them. You had to cry, you had to scream, you had to sweat, you had to cuss out health care officials, and when that's all over with, you'll be willing to put up with a lot more from your kids.
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