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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Funny Proverbs and Quotations - 111
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Learned Hand
There is no surer way to misread any document than to read it literally. As nearly as we can, we must put ourselves in the place of those who uttered the words, and try to divine how they would have dealt with the unforeseen situation; and, evidence of what they would have done, they are by no means final.
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Tiberius
In a free state there should be freedom of speech and thought.
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Thomas Jefferson, letter to James Lewis, Jr., May 9, 1798
If our house be on fire, without inquiring whether it was fired from within or without, we must try to extinguish it.
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Voltaire
Doctors are men who prescribe medicines of which they know little, to cure diseases of which they know less in human beings of whom they know nothing.
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Francois Marie Arouet Voltaire
It is said that God is always on the side of the heaviest battalions.
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Abraham Lincoln
If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one
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Unknown
Accident, n.: A condition in which presence of mind is good, but absence of body is better.
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George Bernard Shaw
All great truths begin as blasphemies.
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Lloyd George
Liberty has restraints but no frontiers.
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Marilyn Monroe
A sex symbol becomes a thing. I hate being a thing.
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Meister Eckhart
In silence man can most readily preserve his integrity.
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Lawrence Peter Berra
When you come to a fork in the road, take it.
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