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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Silly Proverbs and Quotations - 82
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Ulysses
It is as painful perhaps to be awakened from a vision as to be born.
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Jean Kerr
The real menace in dealing with a five-year-old is that in no time at all you begin to sound like a five-year-old.
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Woody Allen, Without Feathers
Whosoever shall not fall by the sword or by famine, shall fall by pestilence so why bother shaving?
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Mother Teresa, -- Letter to U.S. President George Bush and Iraqi President Saddam Hussein, January 1991.
Please choose the way of peace. ... In the short term there may be winners and losers in this war that we all dread. But that never can, nor never will justify the suffering, pain and loss of life your weapons will cause.
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Joaquin Setanti
Be wary of the man who urges an action in which he himself incurs no risk.
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Samuel Johnson
It is better to live rich than to die rich.
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Homer
Look now how mortals are blaming the gods, for they say that evils come from us, but in fact they themselves have woes beyond their share because of their own follies.
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Leo Rosten
For some not to be martyrs is martyrdom indeed.
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Sam Levenson
The reason grandparents and grandchildren get along so well is that they have a common enemy.
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Homer, The Iliad
He knew the things that were and the things that would be and the things that had been before.
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John Kenneth Galbraith
One of the greatest pieces of economic wisdom is to know what you do not know.
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Seneca
It is the sign of a weak mind to be unable to bear wealth.
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