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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Sarcastic Famous People Sayings - 126
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Hannah Whitall Smith
Seeing our Father in everything makes life one long thanksgiving and gives rest of the heart.
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Cato the Elder, from Plutarch, Lives
I would much rather have men ask why I have no statue, than why I have one.
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Dorothy Parker, speaking of Katharine Hepburn
She runs the gamut of emotions from A to B.
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Richard Milhous Nixon
If we take the route of the permanent handout, the American character will itself be impoverished. (Proposal to reform welfare programs)
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Jack Handey Deep Thoughts
It's probably not a good idea to be chewing on a toothpick if you're talking to the president, because what if he tells a funny joke and you laugh so hard you spit the toothpick out and it hits him in the face or something.
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Oprah Winfrey, O Magazine
Become the change you want to see - those are words I live by.
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J. R. R. Tolkien
The world has changed. I see it in the water.
I feel it in the Earth.
I smell it in the air.
Much that once was is lost,
For none now live who remember it.
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George Eliot
One must be poor to know the luxury of giving.
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H. L. Mencken
College football would be more interesting if the faculty played instead of the students - there would be a great increase in broken arms, legs and necks.
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Stephen
Music is expression of harmony in sound. Love is the expression of harmony in life.
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Baltasar Gracian
Even knowledge has to be in the fashion, and where it is not, it is wise to affect ignorance.
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Robert Benchley
Defining and analyzing humor is a pastime of humorless people.
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