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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Sarcastic Things People Say - 106
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Robert Penn Warren
The end of man is knowledge but there's one thing he can't know. He can't know whether knowledge will save him or kill him. He will be killed, all right, but he can't know whether he is killed because of the knowledge which he has got or because of the knowledge which he hasn't got and which if he had it would save him.
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Robert Frost
Forgive, O Lord, my little jokes on Thee and I'll forgive Thy great big one on me.
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Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
Talents are best nurtured in solitude character is best formed in the stormy billows of the world.
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Aphra Behn
Oh, what a dear ravishing thing is the beginning of an Amour
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English Proverb
The shortest answer is doing.
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Shantideva
If you can solve your problem, then what is the need of worrying? If you cannot solve it, then what is the use of worrying?
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Wess Roberts
Anyone who doesn't make mistakes isn't trying hard enough.
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Catullus
My mind's sunk so low, Claudia, because of you, wrecked itself on your account so bad already, that I couldn't like you if you were the best of women,--or stop loving you, no matter what you do.
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William Goldman
Life is pain, highness Anyone who says differently is selling something.
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Proverbs 2719 Bible
A mirror reflects a man's face, but what he is really like is shown by the kind of friends he chooses.
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Thomas Jefferson
The Greeks by their laws, and the Romans by the spirit of their people, took care to put into the hands of their rulers no such engine of oppression as a standing army. Their system was to make every man a soldier, and oblige him to repair to the standard of his country whenever that was reared. This made them invincible and the same remedy will make us so.
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W. C. Fields
I always keep a supply of stimulant handy in case I see a snake--which I also keep handy.
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