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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Sarcastic Things People Say - 96
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Richard Bach
You teach best what you most need to learn.
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Chris Martin, Rolling Stone Magazine
I definitely believe in God. How can you look at anything and not be overwhelmed by the miraculousness of it?
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Alvin Toffler
The illiterate of the 21st century will not be those who cannot read and write, but those who cannot learn, unlearn, and relearn.
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Sir Arthur Eddington
Proof is the idol before whom the pure mathematician tortures himself.
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Henry Ford
Coming together is the beginning. Keeping together is progress. Working together is success.
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Henry George
Let no man imagine that he has no influence. Whoever he may be, and wherever he may be placed, the man who thinks becomes a light and a power.
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Theodore Roosevelt
The death-knell of the republic had rung as soon as the active power became lodged in the hands of those who sought, not to do justice to all citizens, rich and poor alike, but to stand for one special class and for its interests as opposed to the interests of others.
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Jerry Coleman
I've made a couple of mistakes I'd like to do over.
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Unknown
Education is what you get from reading the fine print. Experience is what you get from not reading it.
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Tom J. Connelly
He who asks a question may be a fool for five minutes, but he who never asks a question remains a fool forever.
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Arthur Schopenhauer
Every person takes the limits of their own field of vision for the limits of the world.
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Alan Marshall Beck
A girl becomes a wife with her eyes wide open. She knows that those sweetest words, 'I take thee to be my wedded husband,' really mean, 'I promise thee to cook three meals a day for 60 years thee will I clean up after thee will I talk to even when thou art not listening thee will I worry about, cry over and take all manner of hurts from.'
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