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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Funniest Famous Sayings - 49
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La Rochefoucauld
It is the habit of mediocre minds to condemn all that is beyond their grasp.
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Douglas Adams
I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by.
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Robert Burns
I have a hundred times wished that one could resign life as an officer resigns a commission.
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Thomas Jefferson, Writings
When angry, count ten before you speak; if very angry, a hundred.
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Hellen Keller
Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experience of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, ambition inspired, and success achieved.
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Mother Theresa
One must really have suffered oneself to help others.
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Doris Lessing
Think wrongly if you please, but in all cases think for yourself.
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Samuel Johnson
Do not ... hope wholly to reason away your troubles do not feed them with attention, and they will die imperceptibly away. Fix your thoughts upon your business, fill your intervals with company, and sunshine will again break in upon your mind.
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J. R. R. Tolkien, The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring
All that we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us.
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John Cleese
I find it rather easy to portray a businessman. Being bland, rather cruel and incompetent comes naturally to me.
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Henry David Thoreau
The world is but a canvas to the imagination.
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William Lyon Phelps
Whenever it is in any way possible, every boy and girl should choose as his life work some occupation which he should like to do anyhow, even if he did not need the money.
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