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A random selection of fabulous funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.

Clever Things People Say - 168

Robert Green Ingersoll

The present is the necessary product of all the past, the necessary cause of all the future.


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Fitzgerald

I want to live my life so that my nights are full of regrets.


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American Greetings Card

Sometimes the only sense we can make out of life is a sense of humor.


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Mahatma Gandhi

A man is but the product of his thoughts. What he thinks, he becomes.


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George Will

It is extraordinary how extraordinary the ordinary person is.


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Walt Stack

Start slow and taper off.


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Thomas Huxley

Sit down before fact like a little child, and be prepared to give up every preconceived notion. Follow humbly wherever and to whatever abyss Nature leads, or you shall learn nothing.


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Jeremy Collier

Idleness is an inlet to disorder, and makes way for licentiousness. People who have nothing to do are quickly tired of their own company.


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Quintilian

Nature herself has never attempted to effect great changes rapidly.


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Edgar Watson Howe

When a friend is in trouble, don't annoy him by asking if there is any thing you can do. Think up something appropriate and do it.


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Albert Einstein, The World As I See It (autobio, 1934)

The pursuit of knowledge for its own sake, an almost fanatical love of justice, and the desire for personal independence - these are the features of Jewish tradition that make me thank my stars that I belong to it.


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Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

When marrying, ask yourself this question Do you believe that you will be able to converse well with this person into your old age Everything else in marriage is transitory.



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