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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Funny Proverbs and Quotations - 151
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Booth Tarkington
There are two things that will be believed of any man whatsoever, and one of them is that he has taken to drink.
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Frank Herbert
Ultimately, all things are known because you want to believe you know.
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Leo C. Rosten
Courage is the capacity to comfront what can be imagined....
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Niccolo Machiavelli "The Prince" 1532
There is nothing more difficult to take in hand, more perilous to conduct or more uncertain in its success than to take the lead in the introduction of a new order of things.
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Anon.
The best book on programming for the layman is Alice in Wonderland but that's because it's the best book on anything for layman.
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William Shakespeare, "Cymbeline", Act 3 scene 4
I have not slept one wink.
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James Grover Thurber
The difference between our decadence and the Russians' is that while theirs is brutal, ours is apathetic.
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Guy Albert Lombardo
Many a man wishes he were strong enough to tear a telephone book in half-especially if he has a teenage daughter.
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Virgil
Forsan et haec olim meminisse iuvabit (Perhaps it will be pleasing sometime to have remembered these things, from The Aeneid)
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Unknown
Courage atrophies from lack of use.
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Lewis Lew Wallace
Would you hurt a man keenest, strike at his self-love.
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Bible, Proverbs 23:7
As a man thinks in his heart, so is he.
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