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A random selection of fabulous funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.

Humorous Famous Sayings - 105

Wanda Carter

Take control of your destiny. Believe in yourself. Ignore those who try to discourage you. Avoid negative sources, people, places, things and habits. Don't give up and don't give in.


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Arthur Brisbane, "The Book of Today"

A good friend can tell you what is the matter with you in a minute. He may not seem such a good friend after telling.


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Barbara Bush

War is not nice.


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Henry Miller

The aim of life is to live, and to live means to be aware, joyously, drunkenly, serenely, divinely aware.


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Charles Wadsworth

By the time a man realizes that maybe his father was right, he usually has a son who thinks he's wrong.


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Carl Jung

Nobody, as long as he moves about among the chaotic currents of life, is without trouble.


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Sheldon Kopp

In the long run, we get no more than we have been willing to risk giving.


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Alan Watts

Faith is, above all, openess; an act of trust in the unknown.


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David Richerby

The tooth fairy teaches children that they can sell body parts for money.


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Stephen Ambrose, D-Day, page 577

During the Second World War, the Germans took four years to build the Atlantic Wall. On four beaches it held up the Allies for about an hour; at Omaha it held up the U.S. for less than one day. The Atlantic Wall must therefore be regarded as one of the greatest blunders in military history.


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Barbara Bush

You just don't luck into things as much as you'd like to think you do. You build step by step, whether it's friendships or opportunities.


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Emily Dickinson

We turn not older with years, but newer every day.



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