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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Very Funny Quotations from Famous People - 90
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William Shakespeare, "The Tempest", Act 1 scene 2
What seest thou else In the dark backward and abysm of time?
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Cheryl Renée Grossman
I dream, therefore I become.
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Francis Bacon
A prudent question is one-half of wisdom.
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Benjamin Disraeli
There are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies, and statistics.
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Naked Gun From the Files of Police Squad
Ed Doctors say that Nordberg has a 50 - 50 chance of living, though there's only a 10 percent chance of that.
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Mark Twain
Familiarity breeds contempt - and children.
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Ralph Waldo Emerson, Letters and Social Aims: The Comic, 1876
Wit makes its own welcome, and levels all distinctions. No dignity, no learning, no force of character, can make any stand against good wit.
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Phish
Can't I live while I'm young
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Charles Franklin Kettering
The only difference between a problem and a solution is that people understand the solution.
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Julius Caesar, De Bello Gallico
Men willingly believe what they wish.
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Robert Wilensky
We've heard that a million monkeys at a million keyboards could produce the complete works of Shakespeare now, thanks to the Internet, we know that is not true.
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Hendrik W. Van Loon
In history as in life it is success that counts. Start a political upheaval and let yourself be caught, and you will hang as a traitor. But place yourself at the head of a rebellion and gain your point, and all future generations will worship you as the Father of their Country.
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