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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Very Funny Quotations from Famous People - 110
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Ronald Reagan
Government is like a baby. An alimentary canal with a big appetite at one end and no sense of responsibility at the other.
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Johann K. Lavater
Never tell evil of a man, if you do not know it for certainty, and if you know it for a certainty, then ask yourself, 'Why should I tell it'
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Benjamin Franklin
Five thousand balloons, capable of raising two men each, could not cost more than five ships of the line; and where is the prince who can afford so to cover his country with troops for its defense as that 10,000 men descending from the clouds might not in many places do an infinite deal of mischief before a force could be brought together to repel them?
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Peter Brodie
There is a negative proof of the value of Latin No one seems to boast of not knowing it.
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Benjamin Franklin
An investment in knowledge always pays the best interest.
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Eric Hoffer
The leader has to be practical and a realist, yet must talk the language of the visionary and the idealist.
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Honore\' de Balzac
Behind every great fortune there is a crime.
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Daniel J. Boorstin
A sign of celebrity is that his name is often worth more than his services.
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Kareem Abdul-Jabar
Arbitrary power is like most other things which are very hard, very liable to be broken.
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George Gordon Byron
My time has been passed viciously and agreeably at thirty-one so few years months days hours or minutes remain that 'Carpe Diem' is not enough. I have been obliged to crop even the seconds-for who can trust to tomorrow
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Albert Camus
There is but one truly serious philosophical problem, and that is suicide. Judging whether life is or is not worth living amounts to answering the fundamental question of philosophy.
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Francois Marie Arouet Voltaire
If there were no God, it would be necessary to invent him.
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