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A random selection of fabulous funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.

Humour Quotations from Famous People - 124

Bruce Williams

Never love anything that can't love you back.


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John Steinbeck

The fields were fruitful and starving men moved on the roads. The granaries were full and the children of the poor grew up rachitic.


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George Bernard Shaw

Gambling promises the poor what property performs for the rich--something for nothing.


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Jesse Shelley

Conformity is the ruin of the mind.


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William R. Matthews

Naturally, we cannot say much about the spiritual body, because we cannot imagine what it would be like to have a spiritual body different from that which we now inhabit but it seems to me reasonable to believe that we are weaving our spiritual bodies as we go along.


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Ralph Waldo Emerson

Nature hates calculators.


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Frederick Buechner, Wishful Thinking, 1973

Lust is the craving for salt of a person who is dying of thirst.


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Max Eastman

The defining function of the artist is to cherish consciousness.


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Britney Spears, on her web site, October 2004

My prerogative right now is to just chill and let all the other overexposed blondes on the cover of Us Weekly (magazine) be your entertainment.


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Unknown, Tuskegee Airman motto during World War II

We do not hate those we fight; we do not love those we defend.


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John Keats

Don't be discouraged by a failure. It can be a positive experience. Failure is, in a sense, the highway to success, inasmuch as every discovery of what is false leads us to seek earnestly after what is true, and every fresh experience points out some form of error which we shall afterwards carefully avoid.


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Aldous Huxley

Experience is not what happens to a man it is what a man does with what happens to him.



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