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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Clever Random Quotations - 118
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Trey Parker and Matt Stone, South Park, Prehistoric Ice Man, 1999
Living is having ups and downs and sharing them with friends.
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Johnny Carson, Playboy Interview - December 1967
Who could follow Carson? Well, believe me, somebody can - and will.
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Oscar Wilde
Art is the most intense form of individualism that the world has known.
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Jim Rohn
It doesn't matter which side of the fence you get off on sometimes. What matters most is getting off. You cannot make progress without making decisions.
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Thomas Jones
Friends may come and go, but enemies accumulate.
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Jean Paul Friedrich Richter
Recollection is the only paradise from which we cannot be turned out.
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Jean de La Fontaine
Better to rely on one powerful king than on many little princes.
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Elizabeth II
We lost the American colonies because we lacked the statesmanship to know the right time and the manner of yielding what is impossible to keep.
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Unknown
No good plan survives contact with the enemy.
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Niccolo Machiavelli, The Prince
...people are by nature fickle, and it is easy to persuade them of something, but difficult to keep them persuaded.
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Carey Bowman
The noblest of men deserves not the weakest of women.
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Ralph Waldo Emerson
Conversation is an art in which a man has all mankind for his competitors, for it is that which all are practising every day while they live.
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