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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Funniest Random Quotations - 79
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English Proverb
This is courage in a man to bear unflinchingly what heaven sends.
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Ronald Reagan
You can tell a lot about a fellow's character by his way of eating jellybeans.
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Roger Zelazny
Insofar as I may be heard by anything, which may or may not care what I say, I ask, if it matters, that you be forgiven for anything you may have done or failed to do which requires forgiveness. Conversely, if not forgiveness but something else may be required to insure any possible benefit for which you may be eligible after the destruction of your body, I ask that this, whatever it may be, be granted or withheld, as the case may be, in such a manner as to insure your receiving said benefit. I ask this in my capacity as your elected intermediary between yourself and that which may not be yourself, but which may have an interest in the matter of your receiving as much as it is possible for you to receive of this thing, and which may in some way be influenced by this ceremony. Amen.
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W. Somerset Maugham
Life wouldn't be worth living if I worried over the future as well as the present.
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Walt Disney
All of our dreams can come true -- if we have the courage to pursue them.
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Josef Stalin
One death is a tragedy. A million deaths is a statistic.
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Yukio Mishima
If we value so highly the dignity of life, how can we not also value the dignity of death No death may be called futile.
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Dr. Jeffrey Borenstein
Freedom is that instant between when someone tells you to do something and when you decide how to respond.
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Anonymous teacher
If you can read this, thank a teacher.
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Mark Twain
It is curious that physical courage should be so common in the world and moral courage so rare.
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H. L. Mencken
The capacity of human beings to bore one another seems to be vastly greater than that of any other animal.
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Real Live Preacher, RealLivePreacher.com Weblog, December 16, 2002
I believe love is primarily a choice and only sometimes a feeling. If you want to feel love, choose to love and be patient.
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