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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Very Funny Random Short Quotations - 100
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Carl Sagan
Skeptical scrutiny is the means, in both science and religion, by which deep insights can be winnowed from deep nonsense.
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Rudyard Kipling
All we have of freedom -- all we use or know -- This our fathers bought for us, long and long ago.
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Karl Marx and Friedrich Engels, German Ideology, Chapter 3
One of the most difficult tasks confronting philosophers is to descend from the world of thought to the actual world. Language is the immediate actuality of thought. Just as philosophers have given thought an independent existence, so they were bound to make language into an independent realm.
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Brendan Francis Behan
Courage is the ladder on which all the other virtues mount.
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Proverb
The Devil finds work for idle hands.
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Nikolaus Lenus
Many search for happiness as we look for a hat we wear on our heads.
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Agnes de Mille
No trumpets sound when the important decisions of our life are made. Destiny is made known silently.
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Marcus Tullius Cicero
When you wish to instruct, be brief that men's minds take in quickly what you say, learn its lesson, and retain it faithfully. Every word that is unnecessary only pours over the side of a brimming mind.
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Tom Stoppard
The days of the digital watch are numbered.
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Don Rose
The reason people sweat is so they won't catch fire when making love.
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Charles Caleb Colton
To know a man, observe how he wins his object, rather than how he loses it for when we fail our pride supports us when we succeed, it betrays us.
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Andrew A. Rooney
Making duplicate copies and computer printouts of things no one wanted even one of in the first place is giving America a new sense of purpose.
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