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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Funny Random Short Quotations - 81
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Lester R Bittel
Minds are like parachutes. They only function when they are open.
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Joe Orton
I'd the upbringing a nun would envy and that's the truth. Until I was fifteen I was more familiar with Africa than my own body.
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Phyllis Theroux, in House Beautiful Magazine
To send a letter is a good way to go somewhere without moving anything but your heart.
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Baltasar Gracian
Do pleasant things yourself, but unpleasant things through others.
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George Herbert Allen
People of mediocre ability sometimes achieve outstanding success because they don't know when to quit. Most men succeed because they are determined to.
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Godfather, The
Tessio It's a Sicilian message. It means Luca Brasi sleeps with the fishes.
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Josh Billings
Every man has his follies -- and often they are the most interesting thing he had got.
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Baron Patrick Maynard Stuart Blackett
Don't set your wit against a child.
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Immanuel Kant
Science is organized knowledge. Wisdom is organized life.
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J. Michael Straczynski
No dictator, no invader, can hold an imprisoned population by force of arms forever. There is no greater power in the universe than the need for freedom. Against that power, governments and tyrants and armies cannot stand. The Centauri learned this lesson once. We will teach it to them again. Though it take a thousand years, we will be free.
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Bob Ross
We don't make mistakes here, we just have happy accidents. - from the Joy of Painting
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Eric Hoffer
Our achievements speak for themselves. What we have to keep track of are our failures, discouragements and doubts. We tend to forget the past difficulties, the many false starts, and the painful groping. We see our past achievements as the end results of a clean forward thrust, and our present difficulties as signs of decline and decay.
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