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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Crazy Random Short Quotations - 33
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Office Space
Michael Bolton Yeah, well at least your name isn't Michael Bolton. Samir You know there's nothing wrong with that name. Michael Bolton There was nothing wrong with it... until I was about 12 years old and that no-talent ass clown became famous and started winning Grammys.
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Latvian Proverb
A smiling face is half the meal.
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George Bernard Shaw
The worst sin toward our fellow creatures is not to hate them, but to be indifferent to them that's the essense of inhumanity.
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Boerhaave
The surest method against scandal is to live it down by perseverance in well doing.
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George J. Seidel
The ability to relate and to connect, sometimes in odd and yet striking fashion, lies at the very heart of any creative use of the mind, no matter in what field or discipline.
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H.L. Mencken
Men are the only animals that devote themselves, day in and day out, to making one another unhappy. It is an art like any other. Its virtuosi are called altruists.
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Voltaire
When it is a question of money, everyone is of the same religion.
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Marilyn Monroe
I knew I belonged to the public and to the world, not because I was talented or even beautiful, but because I had never belonged to anything or anyone else.
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George Will
This is an age in which one cannot find common sense without a search warrant.
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Kin Hubbard
A woman will buy anything she thinks the store is losing money on.
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Oscar Wilde, A Woman of No Importance, Act 3
The secret of life is to appreciate the pleasure of being terribly, terribly deceived.
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Author Unknown
Humor - the perfect relationship of the parts to the whole.
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