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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Crazy Random Short Quotations - 13
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Titus Maccius Plautus, Rudens
Patience is the best remedy for every trouble.
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H. L. Mencken
Men have a much better time of it than women; for one thing, they marry later; for another thing they die earlier.
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Isaac Asimov
Science is a mechanism, a way of trying to improve your knowledge of nature. It's a system for testing your thoughts against the universe, and seeing whether they match.
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Herodotus
Some men give up their designs when they have almost reached the goal While others, on the contrary, obtain a victory by exerting, at the last moment, more vigorous efforts than ever before.
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Isaac Newton
If I have seen further it is by standing on the shoulders of giants.
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Leo C. Rosten
In the dark colony of night, when I consider man's magnificent capacity for malice, madness, folly, envy, rage, and destructiveness, and I wonder whether we shall not end up as breakfast for newts and polyps, I seem to hear the muffled cries of all the words in all the books with covers closed.
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William Ralph Inge, Outspoken Essays (1919)
It takes in reality only one to make a quarrel. It is useless for the sheep to pass resolutions in favour of vegetarianism while the wolf remains of a different opinion.
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Huey Long
When Fascism comes to America, it will come wrapped in an American flag.
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Plato
Those who are able to see beyond the shadows and lies of their culture will never be understood, let alone believed, by the masses.
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Woodrow Wilson
No nation is fit to sit in judgement upon any other nation.
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Clarence Darrow
The first half of our lives is ruined by our parents and the last half by our children.
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Tupac Shakur
Reality is wrong. Dreams are for real.
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