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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Funny Random Short Quotations - 41
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Wallace Stevens
The summer night is like a perfection of thought.
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Josh Billings
One of the greatest victories you can gain over someone is to beat him at politeness.
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Howard Scott
Criminal: A person with predatory instincts who has not sufficient capital to form a corporation.
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Georgia O\'Keeffe
I said to myself, I have things in my head that are not like what anyone has taught me - shapes and ideas so near to me - so natural to my way of being and thinking that it hasn't occurred to me to put them down. I decided to start anew, to strip away what I had been taught.
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Stephen Leacock
Lord Ronald said nothing he flung himself from the room, flung himself upon his horse and rode madly off in all directions.
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William Feather
A man must not deny his manifest abilities, for that is to evade his obligations.
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Groucho Marx
Why should I do anything for posterity? What has posterity ever done for me?
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John Leax
Christianity is a matter of willing God's will and through Christ become one with it.
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Paddy Chayefsky
Television is democracy at its ugliest.
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Frank Zappa
My best advice to anyone who wants to raise a happy, mentally healthy child is: Keep him or her as far away from a church as you can.
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Ben Jonson
He knows not his own strength that hath not met adversity.
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Fred Allen
Television is the triumph of machine over people.
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