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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Very Funny Random Short Quotations - 20
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Author Unknown
A fellow who says he has never told a lie has just told one.
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Confucius
If a man takes no thought about what is distant, he will find sorrow near at hand.
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Ed Meese
You couldn't even prove the White House staff sane beyond a reasonable doubt.
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Helen Gahagan Douglas
Character isn't inherited. One builds it daily by the way one thinks and acts, thought by thought, action by action. If one lets fear or hate or anger take possession of the mind, they become self-forged chains.
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Pablo Casals
Music is the divine way to tell beautiful, poetic things to the heart.
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Francis Quarles
Read not books alone, but men, and amongst them chiefly thyself. If thou find anything questionable there, use the commentary of a severe friend rather than the gloss of a sweet lipped flatterer; there is more profit in a distasteful truth than in deceitful sweetness.
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James Barrie
If you cannot teach me to fly, teach me to sing.
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George Washington
Government is not reason, it is not eloquence, it is force; like fire, a troublesome servant and a fearful master. Never for a moment should it be left to irresponsible action.
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Jean Anouilh
To say yes, you have to sweat and roll up your sleeves and plunge both hands into life up to the elbows. It's easy to say no, even if it means dying.
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Henry Ford
A business that makes nothing but money is a poor kind of business.
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Erich Fromm
If it were not for hopes, the heart would break.
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J. Frank Dobie
Putting on the spectacles of science in expectation of finding an answer to everything looked at signifies inner blindness.
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