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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Silly Random Quotations - 112
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Pirates of the Caribbean The Curse of the Black Pearl
Jack Me I'm dishonest, and a dishonest man you can always trust to be dishonest. Honestly. It's the honest ones you want to watch out for, because you can never predict when they're going to do something incredibly... stupid.
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Bruce Catton
To learn to get along without, to realize that what the world is going to demand of us may be a good deal more important than what we are entitled to demand of it - this is a hard lesson.
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Ernest Hemingway
I like to listen. I have learned a great deal from listening carefully. Most people never listen.
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Johann von Goethe
One never goes so far as when one doesn't know where one is going.
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Edward Clarke
The best way to realize the pleasure of feeling rich is to live in a smaller house than your means would entitle you to have.
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Tom Stoppard, Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are Dead (1967)
We do on stage things that are supposed to happen off. Which is a kind of integrity, if you look on every exit as being an entrance somewhere else.
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Mark Twain
A classic is something that everybody wants to have read and nobody wants to read.
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Theodore Roosevelt
I am delighted to have you play football. I believe in rough, manly sports. But I do not believe in them if they degenerate into the sole end of any one's existence. I don't want you to sacrifice standing well in your studies to any over-athleticism and I need not tell you that character counts for a great deal more than either intellect or body in winning success in life. Athletic proficiency is a mighty good servant, and like so many other good servants, a mighty bad master.
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Isaac Disraeli
There is an art of reading, as well as an art of thinking, and an art of writing.
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Erich Fromm
Not he who has much is rich, but he who gives much.
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Benjamin Disraeli
The greatest good you can do for another is not just share your riches, but to reveal to him his own.
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Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi
If we are to teach real peace in this world, and if we are to carry on a real war against war, we shall have to begin with the children.
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