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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Humorous Random Quotations - 115
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Graffito, in Belfast
Is there life before death?
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Hippocrates, Regimen
Many admire, few know.
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Colin Greenwood
No matter how one approaches the figures, one is forced to the rather startling conclusion that the use of firearms in crime was very much less when there were no controls of any sort and when anyone, convicted criminal or lunatic, could buy any type of firearm without restriction. Half a century of strict controls on pistols has ended, perversely, with a far greater use of this weapon in crime than ever before.
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Happy Gilmore
Happy During high school, I played junior hockey and still hold two league records most time spent in the penalty box and I was the only guy to ever take off his skate and try to stab somebody.
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Max Lucado
A man who wants to lead the orchestra must turn his back on the crowd.
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Harriet Beecher Stowe
To be really great in little things, to be truly noble and heroic in the insipid details of everyday life, is a virtue so rare as to be worthy of canonization.
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Unknown
Sometimes the heart sees what is invisible to the eye.
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Jim Beggs
What we say is important for in most cases the mouth speaks what the heart is full of.
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Lady Mary Wortley Montagu
I despise the pleasure of pleasing people that I despise.
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Robert G. Ingersoll
Give to every other human being every right that you claim for yourself.
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Frederick Nietzsche
Religiously strict people, who judge themselves without mercy, are also those who have most often spoken ill of mankind in general.
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Ralph Waldo Emerson
What I must do is all that concerns me. This rule, equally arduous in actual and intellectual life, may serve for the whole distinction between greatness and meanness. It is harder because you will always find those who think they know what is your duty better than you know it.
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