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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Humorous Random Short Quotations - 125
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Charles M. Schwab
Lead the life that will make you kindly and friendly to everyone about you, and you will be surprised what a happy life you will lead.
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Marcus Aurelius Antoninus
Time is a sort of river of passing events, and strong is its current no sooner is a thing brought to sight than it is swept by and another takes its place, and this too will be swept away.
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Christina G. Rossetti
In the bleak midwinter Frosty wind made moan, Earth stood hard as iron, Water like a stone Snow had fallen, snow on snow, Snow on snow, In the bleak midwinter, Long ago.
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16 Idaho Law Review 407, 420 - 1980.
A venturesome minority will always be eager to get off on their own... let them take risks, for Godsake, let them get lost, sunburnt, stranded, drowned, eaten by bears, buried alive under avalanches- that is the right and privilege of any free American.
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Dale Carnegie
It isn't what you have, or who you are, or where you are, or what you are doing that makes you happy or unhappy. It is what you think about.
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Princess Elizabeth Asquith Bibesco
Blessed are those who can give without remembering, and take without forgetting.
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George Eliot
The golden moments in the stream of life rush past us and we see nothing but sand the angels come to visit us, and we only know them when they are gone.
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David Frost
Television enables you to be entertained in your home by people you wouldn't have in your home.
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Greek Proverb
First secure an independent income, then practice virtue.
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Oscar Wilde, The Picture of Dorian Gray, 1891
There is a luxury in self-reproach. When we blame ourselves, we feel that no one else has a right to blame us. It is the confession, not the priest, that gives us absolution.
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Ovid
How little you know about the age you live in if you think that honey is sweeter than cash in hand.
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Grard Depardieu
At twenty you have many desires which hide the truth, but beyond forty there are only real and fragile truths-your abilities and your failings.
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