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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Crazy Random Short Quotes - 93
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Cyrus Ching
I learned long ago never to wrestle with a pig. You get dirty, and besides, the pig likes it.
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Unknown
What man does not understand, he fears; and what he fears, he tends to destroy.
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F. Scott Fitzgerald
In a real dark night of the soul it is always three o'clock in the morning, day after day.
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Alfred Hitchcock, In Simon Rose, Classic Film Guide (1995)
The length of a film should be directly related to the endurance of the human bladder.
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Aldo Leopold
A thing is right if it tends to preserve the stability, integrity, and beauty of the biotic community. It is wrong if it tends otherwise.
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Rudyard Kipling
Words are, of course, the most powerful drug used by mankind.
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Adlai E. Stevenson Jr.
Patriotism is not a short outburst of emotion, but is the tranquil and steady dedication of a lifetime.
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Thomas Fuller
Be not extravagantly high in expression of thy commendations of men thou likest, it may make the hearer's stomach rise.
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Edward R. Murrow
After last night's debate, the reputation of Messieurs Lincoln and Douglas is secure.
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John Sloan
Consistency is the quality of a stagnant mind.
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Albert Einstein
If the facts don't fit the theory, change the facts.
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Mandell Creighton
No people do so much harm as those who go about doing good.
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