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A random selection of fabulous funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.

Amusing Random Short Quotes - 17

Antione De Riveral

The sword of justice has no scabbard.


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Jay Leno

The reason there are two senators for each state is so that one can be the designated driver.


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William S. Gilbert

Love, unrequited, robs me of my rest Love, hopeless love, my ardent soul encumbers Love, nightmare-like, lies heavy on my chest, And weaves itself into my midnight slumbers


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Lloyd Jones

The men who try to do something and fail are infinitely better than those who try nothing and succeed.


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Friedrich Nietzsche

What else is love but understanding and rejoicing in the fact that another person lives, acts, and experiences otherwise than we do


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Fred Allen

The vice-president of an advertising agency is a bit of executive fungus that forms on a desk that has been exposed to conference.


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John Steinbeck

It would be absurd if we did not understand both angels and devils, since we invented them.


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Charles Lamb

Nothing to me is more distasteful than that entire complacency and satisfaction which beam in the countenances of a newly married couple.


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Thomas Merton

The least of learning is done in the classrooms.


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Ignazio Silone

On a group of theories one can found a school; but on a group of values one can found a culture, a civilization, a new way of living together among men.


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George Carlin

Well, if crime fighters fight crime and fire fighters fight fire, what do freedom fighters fight They never mention that part to us, do they


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Charles Dickens

If a pig could give his mind to anything, he would not be a pig.



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