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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Funny Random Short Quotations - 151
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Ellen Goodman
All in all, I am not surprised that the people who want to unravel the social contract start with young adults. Those who are urged to feel afraid, very afraid, have both the greatest sense of independence and the most finely honed skepticism about government.
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Confucius
What is the sound of one hand clapping
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Walt Kelly
We are confronted with insurmountable opportunities.
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English Proverb
A full cup must be carried steadily.
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Aesop
Please all, and you will please none.
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There\'s Something About Mary
Hitchhiker No No, no, not 6 I said 7. Nobody's comin' up with 6. Who works out in 6 minutes You won't even get your heart goin, not even a mouse on a wheel. Ted That -- good point. Hitchhiker 7's the key number here. Think about it. 7-Elevens. 7 doors. '7
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Jane Wagner
The ability to delude yourself may be an important survival tool.
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Henry Ford
Obstacles are those frightful things you see when you take your eyes off your goal.
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Mariah Carey
I try and try to deny that I need you but still you remain on my mind.
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Edna Ferber
Writers should be read but not seen. Rarely are they a winsome sight.
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Oscar Wilde
One can always be kind to people about whom one cares nothing.
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Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
Doubtless criticism was originally benignant, pointing out the beauties of a work rather that its defects. The passions of men have made it malignant, as a bad heart of Procrustes turned the bed, the symbol of repose, into an instrument of torture.
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