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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Humour Random Short Quotes - 144
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Pythagoras
Above all things, reverence yourself.
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Harry S Truman
I have found the best way to give advice to your children is to find out what they want and then advise them to do it.
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Ferdinand Foch
A lost battle is a battle one thinks one has lost.
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Russell Smith
An Indian tribe is sovereign to the extent that the U.S. permits it to be sovereign.
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John Alejandro King, a.k.a. The Covert Comic, www.covertcomic.com
The mightiest of weapons is truth. And everyone knows you’re not permitted to enter a Government building with a weapon.
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Eknath Easwaran
The Sufis advise us to speak only after our words have managed to pass through three gates. At the first gate we ask ourselves, Are these words true? If so, we let them pass on; if not, back they go. At the second gate we ask, Are they necessary? At the last gate we ask, Are they kind?
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George Bernard Shaw
The fickleness of the women whom I love is only equalled by the infernal constancy of the women who love me.
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Wernher Von Braun
We can lick gravity, but sometimes the paperwork is overwhelming.
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Roosevelt, Eleanor
Do whatever comes your way as well as you can. Think as little as possible about yourself and as much as possible about other people and other things that are interesting. Put a good deal of thought into happiness that you are able to give.
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Unknown
Use what talents you possess: the woods would be very silent if no birds sang there except those that sang the best.
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Aldous Huxley
Happiness is not achieved by the conscious pursuit of happiness it is generally the by-product of other activities.
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John Wilmot
Before I got married I had six theories about bringing up children now I have six children and no theories.
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