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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Very Funny Random Short Quotes - 20
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Ralph Waldo Trine
Do you want to be a power in the world? Then be yourself.
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Henry Miller, Tropic of Cancer
I have no money, no resources, and no hope. I am the happiest man alive.
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Seneca
It should be our care not so much to live a long life as a satisfactory one.
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Napoleon Bonaparte
Men will fight long and hard for a bit of colored ribbon.
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Homer
I should rather labor as another's serf, in the home of a man without fortune, one whose livelihood was meager, than rule over all the departed dead.
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Arab Proverb
An army of sheep led by a lion would defeat an army of lions led by a sheep.
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Sir Winston Leonard Spenser Churchill
A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.
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Thomas Huxley
The chess board is the world, the pieces are the phenomena of the universe, the rules of the game are what we call the laws of Nature. The player on the other side is hidden from us. We know that his play is always fair, just, and patient. But we also know, to our cost, that he never overlooks a mistake, or makes the smallest allowance for ignorance.
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Richard Harding Davis
The secret of good writing is to say an old thing in a new way or to say a new thing in an old way.
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Walt Whitman
I celebrate myself, And what I assume you shall assume, For every atom belonging to me as good belongs to you.
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Mary Catherine Bateson
The saddest life is that of a political aspirant under democracy. His failure is ignominious and his success is disgraceful.
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Katharine Whitehorn
A good listener is not someone with nothing to say. A good listener is a good talker with a sore throat.
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