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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Clever Random Short Quotations - 148
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Gustave Flaubert
Be regular and orderly in your life, that you may be violent and original in your work.
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Lawrence Peter Berra
He hits from both sides of the plate. He's amphibious.
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Phillip Earl Stanhope
The knowledge of the world is only to be acquired in the world, and not in the closet.
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Evan Esar
Walking isn't a lost art -- one must, by some means, get to the garage.
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Mary Catherine Bateson
The family is changing not disappearing. We have to broaden our understanding of it, look for the new metaphors.
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Jack Handey Deep Thoughts
I wish my name was Todd, because then I could say, 'Yes, my name's Todd. Todd Blankenship.' Oh, also I wish my last name was Blankenship.
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Unknown
Some people come into our lives and quickly go. Some people move our souls to dance. They awaken us to a new understanding with the passing whisper of their wisdom. Some people make the sky more beautiful to gaze upon. They stay in our lives for awhile.
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Max Eastman
I don't know why it is we are in such a hurry to get up when we fall down. You might think we would lie there and rest a while.
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Frank Zappa
The United States is a nation of laws badly written and randomly enforced.
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Pablo Picasso
Painting is just another way of keeping a diary.
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Ronald Reagan
Freedom is never more than one generation away from extinction. We didn't pass it to our children in the bloodstream. It must be fought for, protected, and handed on for them to do the same, or one day we will spend our sunset years telling our children and our children's children what it was once like in the United States where men were free.
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G. K. Chesterton
Literature is a luxury fiction is a necessity.
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