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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Sarcastic Random Short Quotes - 116
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Oscar Wilde, "An Ideal Husband"
To be natural is such a very difficult pose to keep up.
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Blake Clark
Being in the army is like being in the Boy Scouts, except that the Boy Scouts have adult supervision.
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Anonymous
Liberals are very broadminded they are always willing to give careful consideration to both sides of the same side.
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President Herbert Hoover, in proposing the abolition of the United Nations, in favor of a "cooperation of God-fearing free natio
What the world needs today is a definite, spiritual mobilization of the nations who belive in God against this tide of Red agnosticism. ...And in rejecting an atheistic other world, I am confident that the Almighty God will be with us.
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Henry Louis Mencken
The fact that I have no remedy for the sorrows of the world is no reason for my accepting yours. It simply supports the strong possibility that yours is a fake.
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John A. Locke
That which is static and repetitive is boring. That which is dynamic and random is confusing. In between lies art.
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Henry James
Do not mind anything that anyone tells you about anyone else. Judge everyone and everything for yourself.
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Lorne Bloch
The one bonus of not lifting the ban on gays in the military is that the next time the government mandates a draft, we can all declare we are homosexual instead of running off to Canada.
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George Gordon Byron
My turn of mind is so given to taking things in the absurd point of view, that it breaks out in spite of me every now and then.
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Napoleon Bonaparte
Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake.
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Mark Twain
A man is accepted into church for what he believes--and turned out for what he knows.
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Coco Chanel
Youth is something very new twenty years ago no one mentioned it.
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