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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Humorous Random Short Quotations - 115
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Ralph Nader
I start with the premise that the function of leadership is to produce more leaders, not more followers.
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Sir Arthur Eddington
We are bits of stellar matter that got cold by accident, bits of a star gone wrong.
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Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche
He turns all of his injuries into strengths, that which does not kill him makes him stronger, he is superman.
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G. Gordon Liddy
A liberal is someone who feels a great debt to his fellow man, which debt he proposes to pay off with your money.
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George McGovern
I'm fed up to the ears with old men dreaming up wars for young men to die in.
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Booker T. Washington
Success is to be measured not so much by the position that one has reached in life as by the obstacles which he has overcome.
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Linus Pauling
The best way to have a good idea is to have lots of ideas.
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William Shakespeare, "King Henry IV Part I", Act 1 scene 2
If all the year were playing holidays, To sport would be as tedious as to work.
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Ralph Waldo Emerson
I hate quotations.
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Alma Powell
I don't want to describe the hate mail we've gotten. (on why she was fearful of her husband running for president)
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Jack Handey Deep Thoughts
Whenever someone asks me to define love, I usually think for a minute, then I spin around and pin the guy's arm behind his back. NOW who's asking the questions
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The Talmud
The sun sets without thy assistance.
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