Categories :
 
» Funny Quotes
» Random Shakespeare
» Quotation Generator
 
Quotes On :
 
» Absence

» Acting

» Actors and acting

» Adventure

» Advertising

» Age

» Ageing

» Aggression

» Altruism

» America and Americans

» Anarchy

» Anecdotes

» Animals

» Answers

» Apologies

» Appearance

» Aristocracy

» Bachelors

» More Topics

 
Random Quotes :
 
» Funny Quotes - 1

» Funny Quotes - 2

» Funny Quotes - 3

» Funny Quotes - 4

» Funny Quotes - 5

» Funny Quotes - 6

» Funny Quotes - 7

» Funny Quotes - 8

» Funny Quotes - 9

» Funny Quotes - 10

» Funny Quotes - 11

» Funny Quotes - 12

» Funny Quotes - 13

» Funny Quotes - 14

» Funny Quotes - 15

 
Great Quotes Sites :
 
» Birthday Quotes
» Famous Quotes
» Friendship Quotes
» Funny Quotes
» Inspirational Quotes
» Love Quotes
» Motivational Quotes
» Movie Quotes
» Quote Of The Day
» Quotations Online
» Top Sites
   
Funny-Quotes-Online.com
 

A random selection of fabulous funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.

Humour Random Short Quotations - 114

Leslie Nielsen

'Who are you and how did you get in here' 'I'm a locksmith. And, I'm a locksmith.'


= = = = = = = = = =



Maxwell Planck

A scientific truth does not triumph by convincing its opponents and making them see the light, but rather because its opponents eventually die and a new generation grows up that is familiar with it.


= = = = = = = = = =



Peter Drucker

In all recorded history there has not been one economist who has had to worry about where the next meal would come from.


= = = = = = = = = =



Bill Watterson, Calvin and Hobbes

People who get nostalgic about childhood were obviously never children.


= = = = = = = = = =



Mignon McLaughlin

There are so many things that we wish we had done yesterday, so few that we feel like doing today.


= = = = = = = = = =



Christopher Morley

Read, every day, something no one else is reading. Think, every day, something no one else is thinking. Do, every day, something no one else would be silly enough to do. It is bad for the mind to continually be part of unanimity.


= = = = = = = = = =



Dr. Jonas Salk

Life is an error-making and an error-correcting process, and nature in marking man's papers will grade him for wisdom as measured both by survival and by the quality of life of those who survive.


= = = = = = = = = =



Jean Anouilh

God is on everyone's side and in the last analysis, he is on the side with plenty of money and large armies.


= = = = = = = = = =



Napoleon Bonaparte

In politics stupidity is not a handicap.


= = = = = = = = = =



Elbert Hubbard

Men are punished by their sins, not for them.


= = = = = = = = = =



George Orwell, 1984

If you want to imagine the future, imagine a boot stamping on a human face forever.


= = = = = = = = = =



George S. Patton

When in doubt, observe and ask questions. When certain, observe at length and ask many more questions.



<-- Previous     |     Next -->

 
<< Now check out our massive collection of funny quotations, sayings, proverbs and maxims. >>

More Funny Quotations

 
Funny-Quotes-Online.com
 
 
 
Interesting :
 

 
Custom Search

 

 
   
 
© Website Design Copyright 2009 by Weird-Websites.info