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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Crazy Famous Sayings Proverbs and Quotations - 73
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James Allen
We do not attract what we want, But what we are.
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Harrison Ford
Nothing shocks me. I'm a scientist.
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Dan McKinnon
Be aware that a halo has to fall only a few inches to be a noose.
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Woody Allen
You can live to be a hundred if you give up all the things that make you want to live to be a hundred.
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Marilyn Ferguson
Over the years your bodies become walking autobiographies, telling friends and strangers alike of the minor and major stresses of your lives.
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James Thurber
A husband should not insult his wife publicly, at parties. He should insult her in the privacy of the home.
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Joyce A. Myers
A 2 pencil and a dream can take you anywhere.
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Author Unknown
Courage is always greatest when blended with meekness; intellectual ability is most admired when it sparkles in the setting of modest self-distrust; and never does the human soul appear so strong as when it foregoes revenge and dares to forgive any injury.
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Timothy Leary
You can always pick up your needle and move to another groove.
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Henry David Thoreau
I stand in awe of my body.
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Karl Wallenda
Being on the tightrope is living everything else is waiting.
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William Shakespeare
To mourn a mischief that is past and gone Is the next way to draw new mischief on.
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