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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Funniest Famous Sayings Proverbs and Quotations - 99
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Edith Ann
Frankly, I think the chances of having a happy childhood while you're still a kid going through it are pretty slim.
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Rich Cook
Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning.
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C. C. Colton
Two things, well considered, would prevent many quarrels; first to have it well ascertained whether we are not disputing about terms rather than things; and secondly, to examine whether that on which we differ in worth contending about.
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Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
If you must tell me your opinions, tell me what you believe in. I have plenty of doubts of my own.
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Albert Einstein
The problems that exist in the world today cannot be solved by the level of thinking that created them.
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Robert Hutchins
Education is a kind of continuing dialogue, and a dialogue assumes, in the nature of the case, different points of view.
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J. R. R. Tolkien, The Hobbit
What do you mean? Do you wish me a good morning, or mean that it is a good morning whether I want it or not; or that you feel good on this morning; or that it is a morning to be good on?
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Iggy Pop
What do you do with a lifetime of work? Face it in the morning.
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Jack Handey Deep Thoughts
The tiger can't change his spots. No, wait, he did Good for him
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Barnard Elliot Bee
Let us determine to die here, and we will conquer.
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Jeremy Taylor
It is impossible to make people understand their ignorance; for it requires knowledge to perceive it and therefore he that can perceive it hath it not.
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Oprah Winfrey, O Magazine
The biggest adventure you can ever take is to live the life of your dreams.
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