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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Sarcastic Sayings Proverbs and Quotations - 126
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Unknown
Drawing on my fine command of language, I said nothing.
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Edmund Burke
Hypocrisy can afford to be magnificent in its promises; for never intending to go beyond promises; it costs nothing.
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Helena Cronin, 1992
Imagine a world without Darwin. Imagine a world in which Charles Darwin and Alfred Russel Wallace had not transformed our understanding of living things. What... would become baffling and puzzling..., in urgent need of explanation? The answer is: practically everything about living things....
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Alan Woods
Blame someone else and get on with your life.
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W. Somerset Maugham
Death is a very dull, dreary affair, and my advice to you is to have nothing whatsoever to do with it.
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Jack Handey Deep Thoughts
If you're in a war, instead of throwing a hand grenade at some guys, throw one of those little baby-type pumpkins. Maybe it'll make everyone think of how crazy war is, and while they're thinking, you can throw a real grenade.
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Seneca
Speech is the mirror of the mind. (Imago Animi Sermo Est)
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Miguel de Cervantes
Let me leap out of the frying-pan into the fire or, out of God's blessing into the warm sun.
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Latin Proverb
Vulnerant omnia, ultima necat. (All the hours wound you, the last one kills)
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Homer
I detest that man who hides one thing in the depths of his heart, and speaks for another.
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Albert Einstein
If we knew what it was we were doing, it would not be called research, would it?
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Martina Horner, President of Radcliffe College
What is important is to keep learning, to enjoy challenge, and to tolerate ambiguity. In the end there are no certain answers.
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