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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Humorous Famous Sayings Proverbs and Quotations - 195
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Voltaire
All sects are different, because they come from men; morality is everywhere the same, because it comes from God.
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Clive Staples Lewis
Courage is not simply one of the virtues, but the form of every virtue at the testing point.
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Mark Twain
The best cure for Christianity is reading the Bible.
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Cicero
The man who backbites an absent friend, nay, who does not stand up for him when another blames him, the man who angles for bursts of laughter and for the repute of a wit, who can invent what he never saw, who cannot keep a secret - that man is black at heart mark and avoid him.
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Robert P. Vanderpoel
The most successful businessman is the man who holds onto the old just as long as it is good, and grabs the new just as soon as it is better.
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Simone Weil
The love of our neighbor in all its fullness simply means being able to say, What are you going through
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Charles Dudley Warner
No one can sincerely try to help another without helping himself.
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Henry David Thoreau, Walden
Petty fears and petty pleasures are but the shadow of reality.
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Dwight D Eisenhower
Farming looks mighty easy when your plow is a pencil, and you're a thousand miles from the corn field.
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Knights of Pythagoras
A man never stands as tall as when he kneels to help a child.
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Jonathan Swift, Thoughts on Various Subjects
When a true genius appears in this world, you may know him by this sign, that the dunces are all in confederacy against him.
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Blow
George So in the end, was it worth it Jesus Christ. How irreparably changed my life has become. It's always the last days of summer and I've been left out in the cold with no door to get back in. I'll grant you I've had more than my share of poignant moments. Life passes most people by when they're busy making grand plans for it. Throughout my lifetime I've left pieces of my heart here and there. And now, there's almost barely enough to stay alive. But I force a smile, knowing that my ambition far exceeded my talent. There are no more white horses or pretty ladies at my door.
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