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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Amusing Famous Sayings Proverbs and Quotations - 167
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Rabindranath Tagore
The mountain remains unmoved at seeming defeat by the mist.
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Vegetius
Let him who desires peace prepare for war.
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Francis Saint De Sales
If we say a little it is easy to add, but having said too much it is hard to withdraw and never can it be done so quickly as to hinder the harm of our success.
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Immanuel Kant
Have patience awhile; slanders are not long-lived. Truth is the child of time; erelong she shall appear to vindicate thee.
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Dan Quayle
I love California, I practically grew up in Phoenix.
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Samuel Butler
All progress is based upon a universal innate desire on the part of every organism to live beyond its income.
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J. R. R. Tolkien, Spoken by Aragorn
The deeds will not be less valiant because they are unpraised.
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Garry Shandling
I have such poor vision I can date anybody.
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Friedrich Nietzsche, Aphorisms in Beyond Good and Evil
Disgust with dirt can be so great that it prevents us from cleaning ourselves - from justifying ourselves.
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Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
We judge ourselves by what we feel capable of doing, while others judge us by what we have already done.
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Samuel Johnson
Old age is not a disease- it is strength and survivorship, triumph over all kinds of vicissitudes and disappointments, trials and illnesses.
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Mark Twain
It usually takes more than three weeks to prepare a good impromptu speech.
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