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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Silly Random Funny Quotes - 172
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Paul E. Pfuetze
Now the alternative to despair is courage. And human life can be viewed as a continuous struggle between these two options. Courage is the capacity to affirm one's life in spite of the elements which threaten it. The fact that courage usually predominates over despair in itself tells us something important about life. It tells you that the forces that affirm life are stronger than those that negate it.
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Frank Mankiewicz
A politician will always tip off his true belief by stating the opposite at the beginning of the sentence. For maximum comprehension, do not start listening until the first clause is concluded. Begin instead at the word but which begins the second, or active, clause. This is the way to tell a liberal from a conservative -- before they tell you. Thus: I have always believed in a strong national defense, second to none, but ... (a liberal, about to propose a $20 billion defense cut).
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Dr.
Don't smother each other. No one can grow in the shade.
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L. L. Henderson
Fathers send their sons to college either because they went to college or because they didn't.
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Robert Frost
The only lasting beauty is the beauty of the heart.
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Garrison Keillor
To choose Norm Coleman over Walter Mondale is like going to a great steakhouse and ordering the tuna sandwich.
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Philip
Being convinced one knows the whole story is the surest way to fail.
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Conan Doyle
There comes a time when for every addition of knowledge you forget something that you knew before. It is of the highest importance, therefore, not to have useless facts elbowing out the useful ones.
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Mario M Cuomo
We must get the American public to look past the glitter, beyond the showmanship, to the reality, the hard substance of things. And we'll do it ... not so much with speeches that will bring people to their feet as with speeches that bring people to their senses.
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Bill Hoest
I just need enough to tide me over until I need more.
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John Dean
I began by telling the president that there was a cancer growing on the presidency and that if the cancer was not removed ... the president himself would be killed by it.
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H. L. Mencken
Husbands never become good; they merely become proficient.
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