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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Clever Random Funny Quotes - 188
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Francis Bacon
If any human being earnestly desire to push on to new discoveries instead of just retaining and using the old to win victories over Nature as a worker rather than over hostile critics as a disputant to attain , in fact, clear and demonstrative knowlegde instead of attractive and probable theory we invite him as a true son of Science to join our ranks.
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Thomas Carlyle
Our main business is not to see what lies dimly at a distance but to do what lies clearly at hand.
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Albert Camus
An intellectual is someone whose mind watches itself.
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Friedrich Nietzsche, Beyond Good and Evil, Aphorism 153
What is done out of love always takes place beyond good and evil.
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Alan Greenspan
How do we know when irrational exuberance has unduly escalated asset values
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Mao Tse Tung
Every good communist should know that political power grows out of the barrel of a gun.
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Kurt Vonnegut, God Bless You, Mr. Rosewater
If you would be unloved and forgotten, be reasonable.
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Real Live Preacher
Love the ones you can. Touch the ones you can reach. Let the others go.
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Hugh Elliott, Standing Room Only weblog, 02-14-2003
Listen. Do not have an opinion while you listen because frankly, your opinion doesn’t hold much water outside of Your Universe. Just listen. Listen until their brain has been twisted like a dripping towel and what they have to say is all over the floor.
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J. Deville
In communities where men build ships for their own sons to fish or fight from, quality is never a problem.
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Larry Hardiman
The word 'politics' is derived from the word 'poly
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George Bernard Shaw
Parentage is a very important profession, but no test of fitness for it is ever imposed in the interest of the children.
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