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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Humour Random Funny Quotes - 184
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Eric Hoffer
We are more ready to try the untried when what we do is inconsequential. Hence the fact that many inventions had their birth as toys.
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Mark Twain
Often, the surest way to convey misinformation is to tell the strict truth.
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Hasidic Saying
He who feels no compassion will become insane.
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Theodore Roosevelt
In any moment of decision, the best thing you can do is the right thing. The worst thing you can do is nothing.
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Socrates
Regard your good name as the richest jewel you can possibly be possessed of - for credit is like fire; when once you have kindled it you may easily preserve it, but if you once extinguish it, you will find it an arduous task to rekindle it again. The way to gain a good reputation is to endeavor to be what you desire to appear.
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Anthony Hope
Boys will be boys. And even that wouldn't matter if only we could prevent girls from being girls.
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William Hazlitt
The way to procure insults is to submit to them: a man meets with no more respect than he exacts.
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John Owen
But this is the second work of the law when it hath by its convictions brought the sinner into a condition of a sense of guilt which he cannot avoid, -- nor will anything tender him relief, which way so ever he lose, for he is in a desert, -- it represents unto him the holiness and severity of God, with his indignation and wrath against sin which have a resemblance of a consuming fire. This fills his heart with dread and terror and makes him see his miserable, undone condition.
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William Shakespeare
This royal throne of kings, this sceptred isle, This earth of majesty, this seat of Mars, This other Eden, demi-paradise, This fortress built by Nature for herself Against infection and the hand of war, This happy breed of men, this little world, This precious stone set in the silver sea, Which serves it in the office of a wall Or as a moat defensive to a house, Against the envy of less happier lands,-- This blessed plot, this earth, this realm, this England.
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Baron Gottfried Wilhelm von Leibniz
Although the whole of this life were said to be nothing but a dream and the physical world nothing but a phantasm, I should call this dream or phatasm real enough, if, using reason well, we were never deceived by it.
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Duke Ellington
A problem is a chance for you to do your best.
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Unknown
He who hesitates is not only lost, but miles from the next exit.
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