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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Very Funny Random Funny Quotes - 160
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Ray Kroc
You're only as good as the people you hire.
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H.L. Mencken
A cynic is a man who, when he smells flowers, looks around for a coffin.
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Ronald Reagan
Information is the oxygen of the modern age. It seeps through the walls topped by barbed wire, it wafts across the electrified borders.
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Mahatma Gandhi, 1922 Circuit House speech (court) charged with "attempting to disaffect towrds his majestys government"
Affection cannot be manufactured or regulated by law. If one has no affection for a person or a system, one should be free to give the fullest expression to his disaffection, so long as he does not contemplate, promote, or incite to violence.
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Anthony D\'Angelo
Treasure your relationships, not your possessions.
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Francis Bacon
Anger makes dull men witty, but it keeps them poor.
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Phaedrus
The mind ought sometimes to be diverted that it may return the better to thinking.
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Steven B. Beach, Paraglider magazine, Vol. 1 No. 2
Since the dawn of time there have been those among us who have been willing to go to extraordinary lengths to gain access to that domain normally reserved for birds, angels, and madmen.
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Whittaker Chambers
When you understand what you see, you will no longer be children. You will know that life is pain, that each of us hangs always upon the cross of himself. And when you know that this is true of every man, woman and child on earth, you will be wiser.
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Jean Rostand
My pessimism extends to the point of even suspecting the sincerity of other pessimists.
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Josie Bisset
Dreams come a size too big so that we may grow into them.
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F. Scott Fitzgerald, The Great Gatsby
I had that familiar conviction that life was beginning over again with the summer.
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