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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Very Funny Online Famous Quotations - 30
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Fulton J. Sheen
Baloney is the lie laid on so thick you hate it. Blarney is flattery laid on so thin you love it.
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Margaret Fuller
Art can only be truly Art by presenting an adequate outward symbol of some fact in the interior life.
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Menander
I call a fig a fig, a spade a spade.
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Arthur Schnabel
When I am asked, What do you think of our audience I answer, I know two kinds of audiences only--one coughing, and one not coughing.
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Lois McMaster Bujold
If you want to catch something, running after it isn't always the best way.
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George W. Bush
History is moving, and it will tend toward hope, or tend toward tragedy.
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Robert H Bork
If the children already born each have only two children themselves ... in twenty-seven to thirty-five years the population of the world will double.
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William Hallman
Creation and redemption are the spheres in which these glories are displayed. In creation we see the eternal power and deity that belong to God alone (Rom. 120) while a deeper and richer glory is unfolded in the wondrous cross of the Lord Jesus Christ. There God is fully revealed, not only in terms of His dominion and deity, but in His holiness, love, and grace. At the Cross I learn what creation could never tell me--who God is and what He is to me, a guilty sinner. God is love therefore, He is both light and life. A Savior-God What marvelous grace and glory.
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John Fitzgerald Kennedy
The time to reapir the roof is when the sun is shining.
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Umberto Eco
I have come to believe that the whole world is an enigma, a harmless enigma that is made terrible by our own mad attempt to interpret it as though it had an underlying truth.
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Magus Dactylus, Chronotrigger
Idiots...nothing can live forever.
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William J. Bennett
We don't need more assault rifles on our streets right now.
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