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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Amusing Online Famous Quotations - 97
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Toledo Blade
A great many open minds should be closed for repairs.
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Pamela Ribon, Why Girls Are Weird, 2003
When something that honest is said it usually needs a few minutes of silence to dissipate.
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Randy J. Hinrichs
Life is either a continuous process improvement, or a terminal disease that we will all die from anyways.
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Sylvia Plath, The Bell Jar
To the person in the bell jar, blank and stopped as a dead baby, the world itself is a bad dream.
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William McFee
If fate means you to lose, give him a good fight anyhow.
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The Quarterly Review (England), March 1825
What can be more palpably absurd than the prospect held out of locomotives travelling twice as fast as stagecoaches?
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Baltasar Gracian
Attempt easy tasks as if they were difficult, and difficult as if they were easy; in the one case that confidence may not fall asleep, in the other that it may not be dismayed.
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Deng Xiaoping
Young leading cadres have risen up by helicopter. They should really rise step by step.
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William Lloyd Garrison
I am in earnest; I will not equivocate; I will not excuse; I will not retreat a single inch; and I will be heard.
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Peretz Smolenskin
There are many fine ideals which are not realisable, and yet we do not refrain from teaching them.
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Walter Lippmann
When men are brought face to face with their opponents, forced to listen and learn and mend their ideas, they cease to be children and savages and begin to live like civilized men. Then only is freedom a reality, when men may voice their opinions because they must examine their opinions.
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Alphonse Karr
If we are to abolish the death penalty, I should like to see the first step taken by my friends the murderers.
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