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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Sarcastic Online Famous Quotations - 86
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Marcus Aelius Aurelius
Loss is nothing else but change, and change is Nature's delight.
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Unknown
I look at my myself and see a stone, I look at my friends and see gold, But I look at you, and see a gem.
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Theodore Roosevelt, An Autobiography
Practical efficiency is common, and lofty idealism not uncommon; it is the combination which is necessary, and the combination is rare
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Margaret Thatcher
You may have to fight a battle more than once to win it.
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H Hahn Blavatsky
Meditation has been defined as the cessation of active eternal thought.
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William Blake
No bird soars too high if he soars with his own wings.
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Lord Chesterfield, letter to his godson, December 18, 1765
Wit is so shining a quality that everybody admires it; most people aim at it, all people fear it, and few love it unless in themselves.
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Christopher Parker
Procrastination is like a credit card it's a lot of fun until you get the bill.
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Fran Lebowitz
I never took hallucinogenic drugs because I never wanted my consciousness expanded one unnecessary iota.
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Lawrence Peter Berra
The towels were so thick there I could hardly close my suitcase.
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Henry Beston
Do no dishonour to the earth least you dishonour the spirit of man.
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Joseph Conrad, Heart of Darkness
Strength is just an accident arising from the weakness of others.
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